


Angel

by Tim_Bustin



Category: Sword Art Online
Genre: Action & Romance, Action/Adventure, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Character Death, Dark, F/M, First Time, Gen, In Character, Major Character(s), One Shot, Science Fiction, Stand Alone
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-26
Updated: 2017-11-26
Packaged: 2019-02-07 02:14:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,573
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12831153
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tim_Bustin/pseuds/Tim_Bustin
Summary: What if Kirito had lost the fight to Heathcliff on Floor 75? What would've happened next for Asuna and Kirito, and the fate of SAO?





	Angel

**Author's Note:**

> I'll soon be starting a full SAO fanfiction series, so feel free to give feedback on this one-shot practice. 
> 
> If you enjoy it, please check out my other writing work at timbustinwriting.com - I've written Star Wars fan films, pantomimes, short stories, and a sci-fi/romance novella.

‘Asuna… Asuna’ he whispered ‘you can’t be?’

As she’d laid there watching their weapons strike back and forth – right until the moment Kirito’s sword smashed into a million pixels against Heathcliff’s shield – she’d been trying to move out of paralysis.

Heathcliff’s sword had hovered deadly above Kirito, who was temporarily locked in motion due to the sword skill from his broken sword. The sword charged a glistening red; and as Heathcliff swung it downwards to slash across his chest, descending so quick, one thought went through her mind: I am faster than that sword.

And she was. Lighting fast.

The paralysis took effect again and she fell into his arms. A dial tone beep, and her HP was gone.

She’d never know how warm he might have felt in the real world, but she’d enjoy the feeling of being held by Kirito, in here, one last time.

‘I’m sorry’

Pixels bled through her white robes, staining the sky in virtual blood. They danced around Kirito’s face as they drifted away.

What a bad habit they shared of jumping into harm’s way for each another. What reckless idiots they both were.

She didn’t know what was happening, except death would come in moments. A warm glow of light started to fuzz around the edges of her vision. The cavern walls seemed to erode softly, so they looked smooth; Heathcliff disappeared and the players too, still frozen on the ground.

Death was a sea of white light, with a figure dressed in black trying not to cry as she crossed from the virtual world to the next one.

The light got stronger and suddenly she had to squeeze Kirito’s hand, but her body wouldn’t move; she needed to tug his cloak and weep into his chest; to ruffle his messy hair and promise she would protect him no matter what; to sit on his lap on a rocking chair outside the porch of their forest home, the still evening air just the right amount of warm, with Yui laughing as she played on the fields before them.

The Black Swordsman would survive. Asuna knew that, even as he watched him looking lost, about to burst into tears. He always carried on, no matter any tragedy, and the world would be saved by him. If her time with him here only happened to add to his strength, before she too faded away like so many people Kirito had known before her, then so be it.

Still, it was selfish, dying before him. But so was asking Kayaba to make it so she couldn’t kill herself. For as smart as they both were, they really were both emotional, reckless idiots.

She smiled for him. Her one true love. One day, she hoped, she’d see him again, in a world where she and Yui would be waiting.

‘Goodbye’

And then she did what he had once taught her, as the light in her vision got as bright as a midday sun’s light breaking through the shade of a tree, on a day where Aincrad’s weather was at its optimum. She closed her eyes and took rest.

 

******

A cloud of 1s and 0s floated through subspace. The digital remains of pixelated green shards. An echo rang out from a sunken place.

‘I want your word that you’ll fix it so Asuna doesn’t kill herself’

No Kirito, she screamed, that’s not fair! The fog took him and she screamed, Kirito!

 

******

She couldn’t breathe.

The chills grasped around her throat, clenching and unclenching in waves. She twisted and turned her head to break free, but her neck crunched against itself as she moved, like shards of ice shattering as they were rubbed against each other. She could barely move at all. A million pinpricks stabbed her body, moving slightly so they kept jabbing. It was like being constantly torn apart, put back together, then ripped to shreds again. She didn’t know if she was really seeing, but every sense was pain except the green glow.

 

******

Skin pressed against her cheek. Her body itched. The heat was drained from the left side of her body. She was stiff; fragile. Her abdomen breathed half out, was suddenly restricted, then reluctantly fell back in.

Time passed in pain.

For a long time she didn’t want to do anything. The world was pitch black with her eyes clenched shut. Her mind moved to different parts of her body, sensing discomfort in subtle and different ways, in her arms, legs, chest; heart. She didn’t feel whole.

Time passed.

Eventually, her eyes fell open.

It was like she was lying at the bottom of a murky pool. Eerie green light lit the spacious chamber, that rose to the high windows letting the light in. The cool marble floor shimmered. It was silent but the silence echoed in a feedback loop that filled the space like a heavy weight pressing her down, keeping her lying curled up in a ball.

This was the Black Iron Palace – Floor 1, Town of Beginnings. The architecture was familiar from her few meetings with the Aincrad Liberation Front in the earlier days of SAO. And this hall was a place she’d also been to before – the Chamber of Resurrection, where in the beta test players would come back to life. Now it held the Monument of Life: the list of all players. The dead were crossed out.

‘Oh’ she uttered, and her sounds began to echo endlessly, ‘that’s right.’

She sat up, slowly pushing herself up on shaking arms. They felt like twigs ready to snap.

This new world was okay. She wondered, maybe this was the moment just before death in SAO; in the real world her NerveGear might be charging up right now, getting ready to zap her brain. Her Knights of the Blood Oath gear was gone, replaced with just the basic dark red tunic she’d gotten when she first arrived here: leather boots and a breastplate that was too tight.

Maybe this was a deeper level to SAO. She turned to the Monument and ran her finger down the list of As.

ASUNA

It wasn’t crossed out; instead, it glowed golden.

Well if she wasn’t dead, then she could fight.

She stood, painfully, but forced herself to stay up. It didn’t matter what the gold glow meant. No use crying in a corner. Kirito needed her help; and the other players were still paralysed. She might be too late by the time she got up there, but she could try.

She went to her inventory to equip her rapier. It wasn’t there. None of her items were.

Involuntarily, her hand went to her heart. Yui’s necklace was gone. She inhaled sharply.

‘No!’

She turned and ran to the Monument, and quickly scanned the list of names.

~~KIRITO~~

She fell to her knees and sobbed against the monument. Her heart contracted. She grasped at it, clawing at her breast. She tore at it. Tears streamed down her face in two neat, straight lines. Her old clothes felt horrible.

******

She stumbled into harsh sunlight, that hazed her view from one that was clear into one of fractured pixels; the plaza, the fountains, the trees, the path, were all blurring. She staggered forwards without knowing what she’d walk into, pinballing from object to object, fearful to move forwards but afraid to stop.

‘Good day miss’ exclaimed an NPC. She twisted on the spot; there was more wall and market place surrounding her now. A narrow channel trapping her on both sides.

‘Might I suggest an upgrade for that sword of yours?’

‘No’

‘Good day miss’ exclaimed the NPC. There was no-one else in the market except her.

‘Might I suggest an upgrade for that sword of –’

‘Leave me alone!’

She was shaking. She wanted to hide; to run into one of the hundreds of empty houses that made up the unnavigable sea of the Town of Beginnings, and flop into a dark corner. She’d only have to weep. There was no need to eat, to sleep, to move, to breathe; what you did in here wouldn’t stop your body’s natural processes in the real world; she could just –

‘Good day miss.’

She staggered forwards, clutching at stalls to drag herself forwards.

‘Why hello there!’ a butcher called. She ran down the street.

‘Good day miss.’

‘Stop’ she begged.

‘Why hello there!’

‘Good day – ’

‘Come on in, I’ll share a secret with – ’

‘Why hello -’

‘Good day –‘

‘Stop’

‘Come on in -’

‘Looking for something to –‘

‘Stop!’

‘Looking for something to –‘

‘Come on in –‘

‘Good day – ‘

‘AHH!’ she screamed.

There was a flash of orange light; a jet trail zipped down the cobblestones, with lightning speed, crashing through the town streets. She streaked left and right; past buildings and fountains and trees; out into open space, finally, and out into the fields past the safe zone border; past floating islands; down the rolling hills; choking on the stuffy midday air; speeding so fast she was burning up and wrapped in a fiery glow.

******

The sun was setting on the horizon. In an infinite sky, she couldn’t say exactly where that was, but the plane of clouds floating just below Aincrad’s structure were outlined in softly burning gold.

She waited to see if a new world would reveal itself below the clouds, as they gently passed by.

Maybe she would fall and just keep falling forever, so she’d be in flight. Like an angel passing through the clouds.

She raised a hand to her crushed heart. No necklace there. Her fingers lamely clasped around the threads of her shirt before she left go.

She closed her eyes, standing right on the edge of the world.

‘Kirito’

Her whisper echoed into empty space. She had no energy left. It was really no effort simply to fall.

******

1s and 0s through subspace; a jagged cloud; the absence of clear sensations, just random chaos and pain.

******

The boar jerked at her leg, stabbing like tiny swords with its triangular teeth. Another picked apart the braids of her hair; fangs, saliva and teeth all wrapping into it. She gasped – her leg came off, the bone popping from its socket. She broke out in a hot sweat. A boar trotted forwards and stamped her pelvis into the ground. It’s demon eyes didn’t make her afraid anymore, but then she felt so much that the individual emotions couldn't pop out of the mess.

Heavy sniffs bustled around her at all angles. She scrunched her hands tight and closed her eyes shut just a second before they dived at her. Her ear came loose; her pelvic bone crushed into dust. She whimpered. She was picked apart at all angles and soon every part of her was in a boar’s mouth, rough tongues tasting her lifeless flesh.

Involuntarily, she started to scream; and scream; and scream. Her HP couldn’t drop fast enough.

******

Again. And again. Poisons. Slitting her throat. Standing in fire. A PvP fight with a madman. Any and all monsters she could find.

Her 1s and 0s kept rearranging and she’d wake in pain.

******

‘COMMANDER!’ she screamed to the eerie ceiling, banging her fists against the Monument of Life, ‘Listen to me! You hear me, stop this! Listen!’

She felt her throat rip.

‘PLEASE!’

She frantically equipped her basic sword and swiped against the stone, chiselling at her name on the Monument. Sparks flew.

‘Let me die!’

IMMORTAL OBJECT

‘Please’ she whimpered, collapsing with her back against the Monument.

Her name was Asuna Yuuki, and a year ago all she’d wanted was to work herself to death; the stress of essentially running Knights of the Blood Oath; the endless battles; sleep only coming with tears and exhaustion, never coming from rest but from burning out. Her alarm would force her awake again the next day.

She had of course realised, eventually, why life was pain. It was the not knowing of which world she wanted to live in: the real, where she would work to tears for a future her parents had wanted; or the virtual, where she was idolised, sexualised and overworked… but there was the thrill of fighting to the edge of her limits. The nervous panic of wondering how she’d pretend to be in control when she saw him again. A sky to smile at and grass to sleep in and a little girl who called her mommy. A world was nothing by itself; its people made a world come alive.

And Kirito was dead.

‘I’m selfish. I know that,’ she murmured, ‘Are you punishing me, Commander? Have you always been punishing me?’

She gave a hollow laugh.

‘Well I deserve it. I should’ve stayed away from him. It’s my fault he isn’t here to free this world from you’.

She started to weep.

‘You win, Kayaba – you win! I’ve lost who I am, okay; I fought to the very end, staying true to who I was, but then you had the power to bring me back. You cheated, you bastard!’

Hot tears burned her cheek in neat, straight line streams down her cheeks.

‘If you ever cared about me, Commander – if only one moment of our months of working together actually meant something... then please take me away from this place. Take me to a different world.’

******

The legendary Lightning Flash; vice-commander of the game’s most powerful guild. The girl who died and was resurrected. Heathcliff had been unmasked as the devil of SAO; the solo hero Kirito had died trying to free this world. So this girl, fuelled by righteous anger, was of divine power to the players scared to keep fighting the remaining, impossible 25 floors.

She was hope. She was light. She died so they didn’t have to. In an inky cave she was lone starlight, streaking through the unexplored dark, turning mystery into flawless strategy on the spot. When the new boss looked impossible to beat; when they were overwhelmed and the strongest players were on edge; when the monster’s blade began to strike, about to connect with a fallen player, she accelerated into the shrinking space between the sword and player and exploded in a scream of burning white light.

******

Every time they found her she was drowned in the eerie green light; hiding in the cold marble corner of the Chamber. She’d be still. It took time, easing her up. Her lifeless body stared but didn’t look. They’d prise her arms gently apart; lift her up under the armpits till her feet left the floor and then drag her out of the Chamber, calmly and quickly to a safe house in the Town of Beginnings were no-one would see.

A simple white robe did the trick. Sit her down. Stock up her inventory with only the best equipment, funded by the frontline guilds’ monster drops and spare funds. Wipe away the tears and do her up nice; braid her hair till she was pretty once again, and her orange hair was fashioned like a burning halo, dripping flames down from her head.

One time, after months of this, she spoke.

‘How many more floors?’

‘Hey there’ Klein said, kneeling down to where she sat ‘You’re doing great, our little Beserk Healer.’

She was numb. She folded her hands in her lap and looked down, a twitch of a sad smile appearing but quickly fading.

‘I don’t care what they might call me’ she said softly.

‘Come on now, Asuna – would Kirito want ya lying around here in this mess? Better to get yourself out there; fight this damn game.’

She didn’t answer for a long time. This inn room, with the wooden walls, the simple decor – it was just like the one she had hid in during that first week of SAO, when her life had fallen apart. No need to do anything in here.

‘I was dreaming.’

‘Of Kirito? Yeah; I miss the guy every day.’

‘When I was there, Aincrad felt like it was the dream. And the dream was real.’

‘You know, Asuna, to actually return to the real world we’ve got to go back out there and fight. You’ve gotta; not just for the sake of all the thousands of people here, but for yourself.’

‘It wasn’t the real world in the dream, Klein. Kirito was playing with Yui; the clouds were strange, but we floated…’

She smiled. Her eyes glistened with tears. She looked him in the eye.

‘…I don’t know where it was’

******

Slowly she’d stand and walk up; to Floor 81; Floor 85; Floor 92; Floor 96.

This is how Kirito had used to fight so well: giving it your all and fighting to beyond the edge of your limit. No regard for your life; only guilt in your being and nothing to live for. He had been stronger than Heathcliff – in their fight in the arena, with everyone watching… how long ago was that? Whenever it was, Heathcliff had needed to cheat to win. But when they’d next fought on Floor 75, suddenly Kirito had something to live for. She was sure it was why he’d lost, she would tell herself when she flew into a boss room and let the claws sink into her skin, darting her rapier deep into the monster’s belly. Had he given up the fight after he thought she was gone?

Her HP would hit zero; the dial tone noise would beep; and she was again a cloud of 1s and 0s floating through subspace.

******

Her body itched. She felt stiff and fragile.

Time passed in pain.

She opened her eyes and was drowned in harsh, naked light from above.

Normal. Natural. Real.

I’ve finally died, she thought. The real world.

There was real silence. In time, she lifted her impossibly thin arms up to her head. After twisting and grunting in exhaustion, the NerveGear pushed off her head. How light she suddenly felt. The world of SAO had collapsed, its data deleted and gone forever; wiped from her life.

Wasn’t it strange how beautiful the real world suddenly looked? A thumbprint smudge shaped like a boar on the metal bar of her hospital bed; the little tassels of the bedsheets where it had frayed. Tokyo’s cityscape was gleaming outside her window, but the skyscrapers didn’t really touch the blue sky and its lovely, cuddly clouds.

The feeling faded. She was alone in this room.

She sat up with a fuzzy head. Hair stuck to her skin and she painfully peeled it away. It was scary how little she could move or how small and sterile the room was. It looked so much prettier outside, in the clouds.

Unless her head still wasn’t straight, she figured the hospital would be full of people just like her, waking up. It wouldn’t be long before the room was filled with doctors and nurses; probably reporters; maybe fans who had been following the events and wanted to meet the heroes of SAO. Her family might even be here.

With all her strength, she stood. Her legs bent under the weight, even though she weighed nothing. Clutching a wheeled pole, she shuffled to the door and turned the lock. For once in her life now, she truly felt it. She was alone.

She turned back to the bed and froze.

‘Kirito’ she whispered. He was dressed simply in a black shirt and trousers. He looked bored, like he’d been busy and caught for a photo he hadn’t wanted to be in. She bit her bottom lip, smiling.

‘Oh, Kirito.’

Someone had put the pamphlet by her bed. She bent over to pick it up. The caption on the front read ‘Celebrating the life of Kazuto Kirigaya’. Below that was the picture, followed by a brief timetable of events, who was giving speeches, the main people in attendance, and more.

‘Ooh, Kazuto,’ she whispered, smirking ‘Well, someone kept that a secret. I’ll have to ask you a few more questions too; no point keeping secrets now.’

She laughed out loud. The room was empty and hers and her voice echoed briefly, lovingly comforting herself.

‘My name is Asuna’ she told the pamphlet ‘Asuna Yuuki. And I’ll tell you everything. There’s so much to tell.’

Her thoughts went silent. She felt a tear bleed from her eye. It crisscrossed randomly down her face, scolding her cheek where it fell without caring for her, and dripped onto the ground with a splash.

‘I wonder how tears fall when you’re flying. Oh Kirito, I’m so sorry. I love you.’

Softly, an alarm started bleeping in the corner of the room. She swiftly turned to look at it, the alarm flashing a harsh red. The alarm’s bleeping was joined by slapping footsteps outside. From nowhere a chorus of activity was beginning to crescendo; banging on doors; hurried conversations; equipment being wheeled down corridors.

Her father would be on a business trip actually, she realised. Her mother was no doubt at work. Her brother was probably absorbed in some game.

She didn’t care about this world. It seemed like there were already less memories in her head to recall about her time here. She could feel the real world deleting from her life.

She opened the window. A banging started at the door. No doubt there were dozens of people outside behind her.

She stood before a magnificent glow, and breathed in the splendour.

It didn’t take much effort at all to fall into the world of clouds.


End file.
